A ship without anchor

Recently, I ran into this youtube video that teaches how to perform palm reading. Being curious, as usual, I spent good 30 minutes watching the clips. At the end of the session I realized that I have no fate line, something the majority people has, and I am restless in terms of my way of living. Being fate less does not bother me as much as being restless. Over the past 23 years I have changed places at least 7 times, that leaves me with approximately 3 constant years in the same neighborhood, city, country. In fact, I don't know what it means to have a house with an attic or a basement where all of your junk is stored. Everything comes to me from IKEA catalog. At times, I think that my entire life is like a comic book, where scenes change on every page. I wonder if I'll ever settle down in a particular city for long enough to actually hold a garage sale, bake cookies for the neighbors, know the coffee man in the next door cafe and have the same chat with a neighbor every weekend. But then I question myself, "Can I really handle the routine?" Let's be honest here. Being able to predict my future actions kills me. In fact, my relationships with men don't last longer than 6 months. The minute I know his actions, it tanks and becomes annoying. So, what is it that I am missing to normalize my life? Will this restless behavior shadow me until my death bed?

And once again I am left with questions and no answers. Perhaps, sole routine questioning is the only anchor I have.

Truly yours,
Московская вьюга

Who needs a post-gradute these days?

So, here I am, almost done with my post-graduate degree at one of the elite universities in the world. Employers, according to a bunch of magazines/agencies that compile school rankings, should be lining up with job offers. In reality, I am the one who is hunting down employers and constantly looking for a job. Surely, I am not expecting to get a job right away, but being ruled out for stupid things like: too self-confident or HR reduced the number of vacancies - sounds a bit pathetic. How many more resumes, cover letter and applications should I send out before getting an offer. Back in the days it used to be 25-50, now it seems like an infinite number. Sometimes I just want to raise my hand up and say, "Guys, the recession is over, come on now! Hire me! I'll slave like no one at your department. I am smart, I can do this job!" Unfortunately, no one sees my hand and no one wants to hear me either, as there is plenty of fish in the sea with bigger teeth. So I keep sending resumes, cover letters and filling out applications on-line, perhaps, there is someone out there who is interested in hiring a loyal, hard working post-graduate. Whoever you are, I will find you and we'll work together for a while!
Truly yours,
Московская вьюга

Moscow-Minsk: travel in time

December 30, 2009 - I am on the train heading to Minsk. Minsk - approximately 700 km away from Moscow. 1 country border to cross, though no passport control. Traveling to Minsk is like rewinding the tape and going back in time to the late 1980s. Things are old, rusty and soviet-like. Nothing has changed in Belarus, except introduction of modern cell phones and vogue. People are warm and welcoming, not spoiled by big bucks yet. Nevertheless, living there is not an option. The country is in ruins, which are produced domestically and sold domestically. Life is on hold there. Progress is forbidden. Foreign influence is limited to none. One man show is in progress. No interruptions, fake laughs and controlled applause. A puppet show, indeed.

I am not judging, I am observing.

Truly yours,

Московская вьюга

I am not that rich to buy cheap things!

It is Friday night, and let me assure you that after two exams in a row nothing makes you as relaxed and at peace as two pints of good Irish beer Guinness. That's right! Extra Cold Guinness with a picture of Irish clever on top of it. In fact, if you will compliment it with Davidoff's light cigarette, the life becomes a pleasant journey. Being absolutely honest in this blog gives me a right to declare that if you drink and smoke once in a while, make sure you do it correctly. What do I mean by that? Let me clarify my thoughts. If you choose to drink beer, do not drink cheap things such as Budweiser (the most pronounced and abused beer at any college campus in the US) nor Bud Light. These labels will not deliver any pleasure. Instead they will make you hate all beer. Thus, in order to obtain joy do not be cheap and do spend an extra buck or two on a good drink. Another advice, please do not drink beer for the sake of getting drunk. Such aims can be reached with cheap vodka (Smirnoff) or better yet, buy yourself a bottle of rubbing alcohol at any drug store. Both will satisfy the same purpose. However, if you are after pleaser and enjoyment Guinness or Chocolate Young's Beer will kill your craving. Another suggestion, if you do smoke do not kill yourself with cheap smoky and nasty things. Kill yourself softly. The bottom line is that all of us will die one day or another, there is no such thing as perpetual life. Therefore, why not die from things that make you happy instead of the cheap things that make you sick. Yes, indeed many of us would rather save a dollar and spend it on another bottle of the nasty beer. If you are one of those people, please do yourself a favor and ask, "What am I looking for: quantity or quality?" I am sure your answer will be logical.

Thank you very much.

Truly yours,
Московская Вьюга

The LSE...

I am a student at the LSE. Well, at this moment I am. My home school is far away across the ocean. What am I doing here in a small room that reminds me of a cell? I am studying! The ultimate and true answer. In fact, I have 14 hours left before my first execution-exam. The subject is useless. No one really cares about it except some true believers of the Geneva Conventions. Actually, I take that back! There is another group of people, in addition to the patriots of the Geneva Conventions, and that is scholars. Oh, they love this field of study. Better yet, to attract more students they came up with ridiculously catchy title for the course - The Ethics of War. How can you resist and not sign up for the course??? So controversy! A friend of mine has signed up for this course too. Two weeks later he dropped out. "Why," I have asked him. His answer was brilliant, "We are about to discuss the lives of poor non-combatants. Not cool! I was aiming for a class that would focus on blowing up people instead." Confused. Yes, I was puzzled indeed. However, he did make me laugh and nod my head as a sign of agreement to the rational behind his reasoning. This puts me into position of asking this little and helpless group of scholars, "Why would you teach something that has no relevance to the present day world?" We will definitely agree with you, as a student body. What else would one expect. However, when the moment will come to stand up and revenge for our relatives, jus ad bellum and jus in bello will not stop me nor will they stop anybody else! I will do harm. Yes, may be I will not kill non-combatants. But I will certainly destroy my enemy! Pacifism will not cross my mind, not for a second.

This world is ruled by realists.